I have always been a storm...

Well in true fat lady fashion, I didn't stick to what I had said I would. I wish I could return with words that I have been a faithful vegan - but I haven't. I had cake and pizza. Yea Im a hypocrite and apparently not really ready to commit as much as I thought I was. But I have my reasons - see, some things don't bother me - (which maybe puts my theory to a halt) -  Mozzarella cheese is one of them. I can handle it in small quantities. So I guess I could call myself a vegetarian more than a vegan. I wouldn't eat ranch dressing or mayonnaise but a little bit of  mozz cheese I'm ok with on occasion.

I always pick the toughest weeks to make a lifestyle change. This week, no different. I of course got my monthly friend which makes me want to eat everything deep fried, covered in cheese and topped with bacon. Im so tired that even blinking takes too much effort. I am a tired person though. Sleeping is my favorite thing to do. I am too young to always feel like this, so I am hoping that within the next few weeks I will start to see some increased energy. Im also having horrible headaches. I haven't had much coffee because I have skim milk in mine. Most places dont have soy milk around me, so I haven't stopped to get one. Guess its a good thing - a bit of a detox and to help cease my AA worthy dependency on caffeine. My get up and go, got up and went many times when I didnt have my coffee light with skim milk and three sweet and lows. Yes three. I like to have more saccharine in me than a lab rat.

Nothing ever comes easy for me. I am not one of those people who has the best self control when it comes to food or anything actually. If I see a car I like, I fall in love with the one that is fully loaded and 10 grand more..If i want to adopt a pet, I find the one at the shelter that hates people and ate it's young for breakfast. I dont know why I thought this transition was going to be any different. I think I thought I was going to be sprinkled with common sense dust and all my bad habits were a thing of the past. Not so much. Nothing comes easy for this storm...

It's not as if I gave up. I ate my orange and my bananas and my tofu. My Larabars (awesome), my earth balance and black bean burgers. Even hubs ate his black bean burgers and he liked them. It's great to have someone in your life that supports and has the belief in you that you dont always have in your self. I have that in hubs. He's my biggest fan..as I am his. He deals with my hurricanes, tsunami's, tidal waves and rainbows..all while patiently awaiting his next vegan meal. (Enter sarcasm)


So I try to say...Goodbye my friend....I'd like to leave you with something warm



But never have I been a blue calm sea...I have always been a storm....Always been a storm...